(no subject)
Oct. 7th, 2011 06:07 pm[Filter: Private]
Oohh, I should just go talk to William! Josiah is absolutely out of the question, especially with the awful mood he's been in, and Amelie is just so -- so happy! It's awful, but it's so very difficult for me to watch her and Philip carrying on the way they do when everything with this is so confusing! It's such a mess! She doesn't mean to, but I just can't help but feel like I'm having my face rubbed into how perfect and wonderful and lovely things are for her, when ... when she has everything she wants, and I don't even know what I want! It's not fair!
William would understand. I know he would.
... And he'd probably just turn right around and tell Josiah. And with him acting as though the entire world's against him since the Festival tourney, I just can't risk that. Who knows how he would react to such a thing.
He can't be telling the truth, can he? He can't possibly be. But ... But I just don't understand why he would choose such an obvious lie. And I suppose I could just ask someone, Lauren, perhaps, but ... oh, but who knows who she would tell?
This is all so complicated!
And -- and there's still Jason. He hasn't been nearly so bad, since we ... made amends. And he's here. And he likes me ... and he's here. And he was with me on the Festival, and even if he frustrates me, sometimes, at least he's ...
Oh, I don't know. I just don't know!
Oohh, I should just go talk to William! Josiah is absolutely out of the question, especially with the awful mood he's been in, and Amelie is just so -- so happy! It's awful, but it's so very difficult for me to watch her and Philip carrying on the way they do when everything with this is so confusing! It's such a mess! She doesn't mean to, but I just can't help but feel like I'm having my face rubbed into how perfect and wonderful and lovely things are for her, when ... when she has everything she wants, and I don't even know what I want! It's not fair!
William would understand. I know he would.
... And he'd probably just turn right around and tell Josiah. And with him acting as though the entire world's against him since the Festival tourney, I just can't risk that. Who knows how he would react to such a thing.
He can't be telling the truth, can he? He can't possibly be. But ... But I just don't understand why he would choose such an obvious lie. And I suppose I could just ask someone, Lauren, perhaps, but ... oh, but who knows who she would tell?
This is all so complicated!
And -- and there's still Jason. He hasn't been nearly so bad, since we ... made amends. And he's here. And he likes me ... and he's here. And he was with me on the Festival, and even if he frustrates me, sometimes, at least he's ...
Oh, I don't know. I just don't know!